To this effect, a bottle of gin hidden in the
  underwear drawer will satisfy her searching.
  When she finds the bottle she will fancy
  herself cleverer than you. Take care not to
  steal the gin from the household: you want her
  to find you merely weak, not unscrupulous.

  Your clothes will be folded and there will be
  no locked suitcases or other articles to
  inflame curiosity.

  Other advice? Learn to cook potatoes in 14 ways.
  Be silent, abstain from smoking, and pray
  conspicuously.

  Index