Ten Course Meal


Jalapeño Jelly
Hot! Whewf. And sweet. Gingery. Might be
good with a Mexican omelette or on toast,
with cheese.



Gerber Veal and Veal Gravy Baby Food
Cold and mealy. Doesn't taste like veal.
Tastes like brisket. Not bad for baby food.


 
Hormel Pig's Feet (Value Pack)
When they say semi-boneless, they mean that
these feet have been so pickled as to render
the meat, cartilage, and bone utterly
indistinguishable. Contains 2 percent of
my calcium.



Evaporated Goat Milk
Fine at first but then comes the
gag reflex. Like spoiled cow's milk.


 
Roland Escargots Snails
The texture is not the uninflated balloon that
I expected-- and love-- but...rather... rubbery
on the outside and disgustingly pasty within.
Simultaneously tastes like absolutely nothing
and like absolute filth.



Yuck!



Poppy Seed Cake Filling
Sickly sweet with a brooding aftertaste.
Texture is fantastic! Like a hearty pudding.



Cloudberry Syrup
Tastes like honey, if honey were a mediocre fruit.



Guanabana Nectar
Tastes like Generic Canned Drink. A little
peachy. Would I drink it again? No.



Kraft Pineapple Spread
Hmm! Creamy and pineappley. It'd be
good as a spread on crackers.


 
Chocolate Covered Jelle
Ho-hum. It's just chocolate with fruit jelly
inside. I think my grandmother eats these.



Done-zo