ALL PURPOSE GLUE

Like a ball pit or a bounce house or any
meal that requires a bib, the hot-tub
turns everyone into a baby.

What I mean is that the tub cancels out the
'age' variable in its occupants. We get in
and gently boil to the same temperature,
like celery in a broth. Our voices take on
a sonorous hum. Arms move from water to
rim in identical honeyed movements. And
when we get out, our heads have turned to
ping-pong balls of equal buoyancy.

My dad always wanted one and now he's got
it. "I use it three or four times a week,"
he says. "It's much more than just a hot
tub."


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